Wednesday, May 26, 2004

From The Onion
What do you think? Should Rumsfeld resign?
"Donald Rumsfeld can't be held responsible for the misdeeds of every last soldier who obeys his orders."

"Look, if we start by holding one member of Bush's administration responsible for his actions, where's it all gonna end?"

US gives up trying to impress England
Seriously, again, what happened is the sun didn't set on the empire - its centre simply changed continents, moving west. I was skimming a book on the 'special relationship' by Christopher Hitchens if I recall rightly and found out apparently it was Harold Macmillan who first said, about 40 years after the change (which happened after World War I) that Britain today is Greece to America's Rome, the headquarters of culture but not power anymore.

...And I hate to bring this up, because they'll just call me a warmongering meathead or something, but we're breaking our backs to bring democracy to the whole damn world.

Spoken like a real-life warmongering meathead, which is really scary.

England fights side-by-side with us, and yet they still treat us like they're deigning to form an alliance with us.

Uh, that's because like this blog, the British people for the most part don't buy this war. Tony Blair, colonial governor of Airstrip One, is sending their soldiers over there against their will.

Ask the rest of the world; you'll find a whole lot of nations who would want to be our friends. No, not everyone. But a lot of countries.

No, not everyone - like the ones that get invaded?

Bush posts classified ad for 90,000 troops
WASHINGTON, DC—In an effort to relieve the burden on his overextended armed forces in Iraq, President Bush placed a four-line classified ad in the Monday edition of 75 U.S. newspapers. "WANTED: motivated, dedicated, obedient people looking for career in growing field of nation liberation," the ad read. "90,000 jobs avail. F/T days, nights, weekends. No exp. necessary. Will train. Arabic a plus. Starter pay, solid bnfts." To further boost military enlistment rates, Bush plans to post the job offer at employment offices in 300 cities across the country.

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