Monday, January 17, 2005

From blog member John Boyden
Something to make a lot of us feel old
A mass e-mail full of stateside trivia:

Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly change things. Each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together a list to try to give the faculty a sense of the mindset of this year's incoming freshmen.

Here's this year's list:

• The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1986.

The year I first went to S. Clement’s (High Mass for the feast of Our Lady of Clemency), an experience of a kind sought for some time which was life-changing all the same, and where I first met Fr Peter Laister, who gave me his blessing when I set out completely on my own starting my adult life three years later.

And the year of my third shouting match with a mainstream RC priest, a type I’d first met in person two years earlier. (Him regarding traditionalism: ‘Those people are dead! Those practices are dead!’ Today, not so much — it’s more likely he is.)

• They are too young to remember the first space shuttle blowing up.
• Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
• Bottle caps have always been screw-off and plastic.
• The CD was introduced the year they were born.

I still call them ‘records’.

• They have always had an answerphone.
• They have always had cable.
• They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
• Jay Leno has always been on ‘The Tonight Show’.
• Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.
• They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.
• They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
• They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.

The year they were born I saw Robin Williams live and he ruled. He won some kind of Golden Globe award last night, maybe for lifetime achievement, and deserved it. My picks: Good Morning, Vietnam, The Fisher King and Awakenings (try Dr Oliver Sacks’ book too!). Moscow on the Hudson looks pretty good too. Don’t see Dead Poets Society unless you enjoy the equivalent of being punched in the stomach.

• They never heard: "Where's the beef?", "I'd walk a mile for a Camel", or "ze plane, Boss, ze plane".
• They do not care who shot J.R. and have no idea who J.R. even is.
• McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
• They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.

So what? Typewriters suck. They can type very well, thank you, as they’ve lived with graphical-user-interface home computers all their lives.

Do you feel old yet? Pass this on to the other old fogies on your list.
This young fogey enjoyed it.

To which one can add:

• They don’t remember the Falklands war (unlike the business today really a noble cause ‘for Queen and country’ defending one’s own people) or the Pope visiting Britain.
• They probably don’t remember Thatcherism, Koo Stark, the ambulance-drivers’ strike or ‘No poll tax!’

No comments:

Post a comment

Leave comment