Religious non-news
‘Dog bites man’ and ‘sun rises in east’, perennial non-stories. Listing some, in the tradition of GetReligion:

• A minister discovers universalism (like he invented it – not) and is thrown out of a job. A little made-to-order media martyr.
• A mainline denomination (doesn’t matter which; they’re all the same) does something way out in left field (by nature that’s what they do) and its losing relative conservatives leave to form a little, slightly less liberal but still liberal mainline denomination. Gets coverage for the same reason vagantes below do, even though lots of people don’t go to them any more. The slant: the denom is brave and a victim; the losing side is ‘mean’. Of course a church has the right to govern itself but please.
• A priest gets caught or accused of sinning. Unless it’s churchwide, like the underage gay sex scandal or Maciel, who cares? (Not catching Maciel all those years was a big failure of the Novus Ordo neocons; Pius XII’s Vatican was about to can Maciel when Pius died; kudos to Ratz/Benedict for doing so decades later.) Gossip: detraction (when it’s true) and/or calumny (malicious lies), covered by the 8th Commandment.
• Someone whose conversion was a big deal online converts again, also a big deal online. More gossip.
• Gay and female vagantes, a sideshow for reporters who want to spite the Catholic Church. (No, St Gargantua’s College doesn’t owe Fr Fabulous from Our Lady of the Garage a job.)